What is Domestic Violence?
Domestic violence is a pattern of controlling behaviors – violence or threats of violence – that one person uses to establish power over an intimate partner in order to control that partner’s actions and activities.
What resources are available?
SafeHouse of Seminole’s services include:
• Long and short term campus housing
• Counseling/personal advocacy
• Support groups
• Court advocacy
• Community resources for housing, childcare, legal advocacy
• Providing clothing, food and transportation
• Pet assistance
Why do people stay in abusive relationships?
Every situation is different. Each person has their own reasons for remaining in an abusive relationship. The most common reasons are love, fear, or a lack of resources. It is important not to judge someone for staying.
What are the warning signs of domestic violence?
There is no way to spot an abuser in a crowd, but most abusers share some common characteristics.
Some of the subtle warning signs include:
• They insist on moving too quickly into a relationship.
• They can be very charming and may seem too good to be true.
• They insist that you stop participating in leisure activities or spending time with family and friends.
• They are extremely jealous or controlling.
• They do not take responsibility for their actions and blame others for everything that goes wrong.
• They criticize their partner’s appearance and make frequent negative remarks.
• Their words and actions don’t match.
Any one of these behaviors may not indicate abusive actions, but it’s important to know the red flags.
Many people do not realize they are in an abusive relationship because they have not yet been physically hurt.
These are the most common warning signs associated with all types of abusive relationships:
- Is your partner insulting you, putting you down or blaming you for everything that happens?
- Is your partner telling you that you are not worthy or “not good enough” to be loved?
- Is your partner excessively jealous and/or overly possessive?
- Is your partner prone to an explosive or “bad temper?”
- Is your partner keeping you from having your own friends, or seeing your family?
- Is your partner keeping you from having your own opinions, or not allowing you to speak freely?
- Is your partner keeping you from carrying or spending money, controlling how much you spend or making financial decisions without your input?
- Is your partner threatening you in any way, which makes you feel afraid?
- Is your partner someone who destroys things or possessions when angry?
- Is your partner pushing, slapping, hitting, kicking, biting, or grabbing you at the neck, or pulling your hair?
- Is your partner forcing you to have sex when you don’t want to?
- Is your partner threatening to hurt or kill you, your children, pets or members of your family?
ANY of the following incidents are signs of increased danger:
- Abuse is happening more often.
- Partner’s controlling behavior becomes more obvious to others.
- Stalking, electronic tracking and checking phone for calls and texts.
- Physical contact or “sex-play” gets rougher.
- Partner tries to strangle you, puts hands around your neck or applies pressure to your neck.
- Partner has access to a gun.
- Partner abuses drugs or alcohol. Increased danger if partner gets drunk or high daily or almost daily.
- Partner threatens to kill self or others.
- You become pregnant and your partner becomes increasingly jealous or controlling.
- Partner is increasingly jealous, suspicious, or possessive.
- Partner hurts or kills pets.
- Partner feels as though he is losing control over you.
- Someone outside of your home becomes aware of the abuse.
If you need help leaving an abusive relationship, call SafeHouse’s 24 hour crisis hotline: 407-330-3933.